


Love as they know it

by oddstrangerchick



Category: Queer as Folk
Genre: Drama, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-03-15
Updated: 2008-06-30
Packaged: 2013-05-30 12:57:29
Rating: M
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,669
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4133158/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1523646/oddstrangerchick
Summary: Post 513; Its been 6 months since Justin left Pittsburg. He's back for Brian's birthday and the love is still as hott as they remember. Its my first fanfic so give me some tips thanks





	1. thirty fucking six

It had been 6 months since Justin arrived at New York. His art connections had gotten him a job at an art gallery where he eventually hung his own art. He bought a loft in the east village and pretty much lived his life like a true New Yorker. It was Brian's birthday and he was on the first grey hound to Pittsburg. He laughed remembering a couple of months ago how Brian taunted him because he thought he would never ride on a grey hound. He had asked Hunter to pick him up from the bus station knowing that if he asked anyone else they would eventually tell Brian. The bus parked at the station and opened its doors letting in a gust of wind that engulfed Justin's lungs.

"Home sweet Pittsburg," he said to no one in particular.

As he descended the bus stairs slowly making sure not to miss any steps, he couldn't risk getting hurt this weekend. Standing a couple of feet away was a tall slender man with brown and hazel eyes. He had a look that said 'fuck the world' and he was proud of it. Brian Kinney was the most beautiful man Justin had ever seen, and most people would agree. He extended his arms at the sight of Justin, waiting for the shocked blonde to come back to reality and hug him. Justin dropped his bag and embraced Brian taking in every detail and smell. The smell of cologne and cigarettes that he loved so much; he imagined that smell every day but obviously never did it justice. Brian took Justin's face in his hands and their lips touched. They both moaned, they wanted that kiss for weeks. Last time they saw each other was at Justin's gallery opening that Brian wasn't going to miss for the work. Brian picked Justin's bag up and headed for the car.

Justin climbed into the car and frowned, "So tell me Mr.Kinney who told you and how did you convince Hunter to let you come get me instead of him?"

Brian smirked and picked Justin's hand up while keeping the other on the steering wheel, "My dear sunshine when will you learn the Novotney house hold, holds no secrets. Hunter had to tell dear daddy Michael where he was going on this fine evening and of course Mikey told me. As for Hunter it was actually quiet easy to convince him." Brian thought for a minute that it was actually too easy.

"Well, I'm glad I guess. I missed you," Justin raised Brian's hand to his mouth and kissed it lightly.

"Oh yeah, How much?" Brian laughed.

Justin leaned over kissing Brian's neck. Brian kept his eyes on the road as best he could, trying not toyield to every touch. Then as soon as Justin was sure they hit a red light, he leaned over more grabbing Brian's cock which had been hard already. A slight moan escaped Brian's mouth, which made Justin smile.

"Is that enough Mr.Kinney?" Justin smiled and kissed the side of Brian's face.

"Not even close, but wait until we get home I don't want an accident to happened before I've fucked you in every room of the loft." Brian squeezed Justin's hand trying to be casual, but at the same time trying not to reveal how much he actually missed Justin.

Justin sat back and smiled, "Ever the Romantic."

As they got close to the loft the sexual tension between them grew even more intense. Brian gripped the steering wheel harder and finally they were home. Forgetting Justin's bag, Brian chased Justin up the stairs to busy and horny to wait for the elevator. Brian thrusted Justin onto the door and kissed him fiercely forcing his hand down Justin pants and feeling his cock go instantly hard. Brian opened the door with his other hand.

"SURPRISE!"

Everyone was there from Ben, Michael, and Hunter to Lindsey, Melanie, J.R., and Gus. Debbie and Carl, Drew and Emmett, Ted and Blake and even Jennifer and Tucker showed up. Brian pulled his hand out of Justin's pants and Justin thought of everything he could to make his dick go down.

"Ha! I told you they would come in half naked of at least starting to fuck. Well you dumb fuck happy freaking birthday. 36 who knew the day would come." Debbie walked over and hugged Brian and that's when everyone else thought it was fine.

"Daddy," Gus ran into Brian's arms embracing him.

"Wow Sonny boy, if you keep getting any bigger I don't think I will be able to carry you anymore," Brian kissed the little boys forehead and smiled.

"Daddy guess what? Me and J.R. got you a gift." Gus picked up a gift from the table and handed it to Brian. Brian walked over to the couch and unwrapped the present. Inside was a photo album with pictures of Brian and Gus and a couple of Brian and J.R. Brian turned the pages smiling at each picture as it went on. There were pictures of Gus's first day of kindergarten in Toronto. Memories that Brian wished he was part of.

"Daddy do you like it?"

"No Sonny Boy, I love it," Brian took Gus in his arms and hugged him.

"Who knew Brian Kinney could show such emotion," Melanie said from the other couch with J.R. in her arms.

"Well my dear Muncher times change yah know." Brian smirked and went back to the album.

Lindsey walked over and sat next to Melanie, "Did you see the picture Justin drew in there."

Brian turned to the last page where there was a drawing. Gus was in Brian's arms with Justin sitting next to him playing with Gus' hair. Lindsey and Melanie were holding Jenny Rebecca while Michael and Ben looked over their shoulders; even Hunter was on the floor playing his game boy. Justin came over and sat on the arm of the chair.

"You Like it Brian?" Justin smiled seeing that the older man was close to tears. "Aw don't cry we will have our fuck-a-thon later, " he whisper so only Brian could hear.

"Its good and I don't cry." Brian said taking a deep breath.

"Its fucking brilliant and you know it" Justin squeezed Brian's arm and went back to talking to Drew.

"Alright. Now in honor of the great and fuckable Brian Kinney me and my lovely grandson," she said while giving a tight squeeze to Hunter, "have made a fucking awesome cake."

As soon as she said cake Michael wheeled out a cake that could feed 200, in the shape of a penis and in balls were the numbers 3 and 6. Brian shook his head at the number and Justin put his arm around his shoulder.

"Its not that old yah know," he smiled and kissed the side of Brian's face.

Everyone began to sing _Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday dead Brian Happy Birthday to you. _After that Brian blew out his cake not revealing his wish no matter how much Justin 'persuaded' him. Lindsey began to cut and distribute the cake.

Brian walked over to Hunter at the couch and Justin sat on his lap smiling.

"So Hunter is this why it was so easy to persuade you to let me pick Justin up?"

"Well yah know," Hunter smiled and put his arms behind his head.

"Yeah thanks for being such a snitch Hunter I really wanted to surprise him, but this is good too." Justin added that last part seeing Hunter's face fall.

Gus came over and sat on Brian's lap with a slice of cake in his hand.

"Mama told me to ask you to help me eat the cake but I'm six years old and I'm not a baby like Jenny Rebecca but I told her I don't mind cause I like being with my daddy." Gus smiled and began to take another bite out of the cake.

Brian chuckled, "I like being with you too Sonny boy. Which Mama told you to come over here anyway?"

Gus looked up at him confused, "I only have one Mama," he pointed to Lindsey, "and that's my Mommy." He pointed to Melanie this time. "You are my daddy," he gave Brian a kiss on the cheek, "and you," he pointed to Justin, "are my cool uncle Justin." Gus smiled at him before returning to his slice of cake.

"Yep," said Justin. "And then you have your Grandma Debbie, and Carl I guess. You're Uncles Emmett Ted Blake and Drew, lets not forget your Uncles Ben and Michael. And you're Cousin Hunter."

"Mhm, and Grandma Jenny and Tucker." Gus smiled again devouring the last piece. He hopped off his dads lap and went to persuade his mom for another slice.

Justin laughed and leaned into Brian kissing his chin. They sat their as people came and went asking about New York or talking about their lives a bit. Justin realized every time someone mentioned Babylon or clubbing Brian threw them a 'shut up' look which he was going to investigate later. By 11 most of the kids were tired and people had to work the next day. Lindsey promised to stop by tomorrow to help with the clean up. Brian picked up a sleeping Gus from his bed and headed down to the rented car Mel and Lindsey got. After putting Gus in the car he said good night to Melanie and turned to face Lindsey wrapping his arms around her.

"I wish you never had to leave Wendy. How do I survive without you?" Lindsey smiled and kissed Brian.

"Peter you do just find, besides you have the lost boys to help you along." She got into the car and they drove off to Michael and Ben's house where they were staying.

Brian rode the elevator up trying to beat his exhaustion by picturing Justin naked. He smiled at that thought and opened the door. There was Justin on the bed 'Perfect' he thought. Brian kneeled behind Justin kissing his neck and putting his hands under Justin's shirt, pleased for the skin on skin contact. He saw a bag in Justin's hand which Justin examined deeply.

"What's that sunshine?"

"You're Gift."

"You're enough of a gift for me. Besides you have to save your money." Brian kept kissing the blonde though.

Justin handed him the gift, "Here though after Gus' gift I don't think this one will hold up to it."

Brian smiled and took the gift from him, "I'm sure I will love it." He pulled a small box out of the bag and inside was a ring that was engraved _its only time love is forever bj._

Brian turned the ring over in his hand. Justin hesitantly grabbed the ring and slipped it onto Brian's finger. Frowning a bit Brian was reminded of what he would have worn for the rest of his life if the wedding would have gone through. Justin looked at Brian's face worried that he made the wrong decision, maybe he should have given him the painting instead. 'Ugh' why had he been so stupid as to give Brian a romantic symbol?

"You know," Justin had to take a deep breath his voice was cracking and he knew by Brian's face that he could tell. "I love you, and I-I just wanted to show you that . . ." Brian kissed Justin.

"I love it," 'and I love you' Brian thought but wasn't able to say. "Its just it reminded me of ..."

"The wedding," 'crap Justin thought' "I didn't mean to. I just saw it and thought of what you told me that day." He turned to face Brian, "I know you said you didn't want to be with someone who sacrifices themselves and calls it love but now it's different. I have my gallery there which Cameron running it and all I really need in my life is … you" Justin frowned down playing with the sheets. Brian pulled Justin's shirt off and began to kiss his chest lingering a while on the nipple piercing he secretly loved. Brian unzipped Justin's pants and his tongue played at the opening making Justin moan. Brian ripped his jeans completely off. Justin arched his back needing Brian in him or vise versa. Brian's lips wrapped around Justin's cock tending to its every need. Brian tried something new a trick tried a while ago.

"Oh god! Where did you learn that from? Fuck Brian Fuck I need you in me NOW!"

Brian smiled, "That's the plan" and went back to working on Justin's cock. Justin finally came and Brian kissed his way back to Justin's lips. "I want you to stay more than you know, but I wont let you sacrifice anything for me no matter how much," 'I love you, oh fuck Brian grow some balls' he thought. "No matter how much I love you." He went back to kissing Justin, leaving him lost in thought. Justin kissed Brian absent mindedly and finally pulled Brian's face away and sat up. Brian ran his hand through his hair.

"Brian fucking Kinney when will you understand the only thing I have ever sacrificed is you, and that kills me. I can still be an artist in Pittsburg yah know. It doesn't cost that much to send my paintings to New York." Justin sighed knowing what Brian was going to say. He frowned, his eyes glazed with tears and he took Brian's hand and kissed it. "You can't make me leave you. I am as stubborn as you remember."

Brian smiled and pulled Justin into his arm kissing the blonde's forehead, "Oh I know. I just want to make sure that you are sure about this, because if you are than I don't see any reason we should ..."

"Postpone the wedding any longer. You read my mind." Justin turned in Brian's arms and kissed him passionately. Justin smiled and got up leaving Brian wanting more.

"Where the fuck do you think your going?" Brian got up and followed Justin into the kitchen.

"I have a fucking wedding to plan duh."

What they hadn't realized was that Lindsey had let herself in so she could begin the cleaning. They both turned to see her shocked face and the word 'wedding'.

"You're getting married … again?!" Here is the story no matter how much Lindsey loved Brian and Justin she always feared that when they got married she was going to loose her best friend, her 'Peter'.

Justin and Brian looked at each other and shrugged smiling at her and nodding. They told her about their conversation and Lindsey told them how she thought it was wonderful and she would help anyway she could. They told her they would clean up and they would be by Deb's for diner. While closing the door Brian grabbed Justin's cock.

"Now where were we?"

"Planning a wedding I believe. First we need to find the golden gardenias and then fuck we have to send invitations out and the rings and …" Brian had wrapped his arms around Justin and kissed him.

"RELAX SUNSHINE. You're always trying to stress yourself out. We will call Emmett, I'm sure he would love to plan the whole thing. Come on lets go take a shower, I promised Gus we would take him to the park today."


	2. my middle name isn't fucking

After a day at the park with Gus, Brian and Justin returned to the loft to get ready before dinner at Deb's. In what Brian called "Conserving water" they took a shower together. Brian looked at every curve and muscle on Justin's body. 'This is right' he thought. Michael had tried to convince him that he was better off without Justin. That had got them into an argument that lasted almost 2 months, but Brian knew he was wrong. He had gone from the man who believe in 'fucking not love' to the man who was undoubtedly in love with this blonde beauty. He chuckled to himself, how he had gone so far into all this love business, after growing up in the Kinney household he thought he would never go there before. 

He squeezed Justin's but one more time before leaving the shower. Justin frowned, "Seriously, Where are you going?" He reached out to grab Brian but Brian was already drying off in the bed room. Justin turned the water off and took a towel off the shelf. He walked into the bedroom to find Brian sitting on the bed with his face in his hands. Justin sat next to him and put an arm around him. He started to kiss Brian's cheek and neck.

"What are you doing sunshine?" Brian looked up at Justin.

"Killing you with kindness." Justin smirked remembering when he last said that to Brian. Brian wrapped his arms around Justin's waist and kissed him. Justin put his hand on Brian's face and pulled away. "What's wrong Brian?" Justin's eyes glazed over with tears of preoccupation.

"Ugh," Brian could not resist those eyes. He leaned back onto the mattress pulling Justin with him. "Nothing's wrong Sunshine. I was just thinking about us. Like you said who knew 2 little boys could break down my walls of 'no love'." Brian smiled and kissed the top of Justin's head. "Where would I be today without you and Gus?"

Justin looked up and kissed Brian's chin, "You would be Brian Fucking Kinney down at Babylon with the hottest piece of ass you could find." Brian smirked, "Sure a 36 year old over the hill club boy."

Justin rolled his eyes and got up. Brian watched him as he got dressed smiling. With a stern look from Justin he got dressed. They held hands while driving over to Debbie's house. Justin tried to let go of Brian's hand to get out of the car but Brian held on.

"What is it?" Justin asked.

Brian pulled a box out of his coat and handed it to Justin. "I never returned them." Brian blushed slightly, but stayed serious.

Justin opened the box to find the rings from their wedding. He took Brian's ring out and slipped it onto Brian's finger. He smiled and kissed the ring. Brian took Justin's ring out and slipped it onto his finger, he also kissed it. After a long and passionate kiss they walked into Debbie's house. They all had fun and told jokes and stories like most of Debb's dinners. By dessert everyone was in the living room. Gus was asleep in Brian's arms and J.R. was on Justin's lap playing with the ring on his finger. Debbie was carrying the pie into the living room when she noticed what J.R. was playing with. Suddenly there was a crash and everyone turned to see the pie on the floor and a shocked face on Debbie.

Michael, Ben and Carl ran over to her. "Ma, what's wrong?" She turned and pointed to Justin. "What you do now you little twat," Debbie slapped Michael over the head. "Hey! What was that for?"

"Sunshine didn't do anything it was … Brian?" She looked over at Brian.

Melanie laughed and whispered more to herself, "Who else?"

"No, no shut up Melanie sweetie. They have wedding bands on. If I fucking find out that you two got married without telling me I swear to god I will fuck you guys up so much you won't be able to sit let alone fuck for the next month." Debbie stared Brian and Justin down making them both smile.

"So you're telling me Lindsey didn't tell you?" He chuckled. 

"Why do you think I'm such a snitch, fuck you Brian," Lindsey yelled. 

None of them knew Gus was awake by now, "Mama no, no do not yell at Daddy." Gus ran over and hugged Brian. 

"All of you calm the fuck down," Debbie yelled.

"Okay Brian and I came to a … agreement. We are getting married," Justin smiled and looked at everyone.

"Yeah that will last long," said Michael in barely a whisper after everyone began to congratulate them.

Everyone looked over at Michael. Ben giving him a look that plainly said 'Don't go there.' Hunter took that as a cue and got Gus and J.R. and brought them upstairs. 

"Excuse me Mikey, What did you say?" Brian asked getting up.

Michael went ahead without thinking, "I mean seriously, your more about fucking not 'making love' you don't do commitment or wedding bands, your Brian fucking Kinney." 

"Stop! Why must people keep saying that, my middle name isn't fucking." Brian put his hand through his hair a couple times before regaining some self control. "I love Justin and that's all that matters. I thought my so called best friend would be happy for me."

"You don't love him. There was a bomb Brian and you got scared that you were going to loose your trick that never left. So you told him what you thought he wanted to hear."

"THAT'S BULLSHIT! I do love him. What the fuck, why can't you guys accept that." Frustrated Brian walked out of the house. Justin stood up looking at Michael and shook his head. He got his coat and Brian's and ran after him.

Justin didn't have to look far. Brian was on the front porch smoking a cigarette. Justin came from behind and wrapped his arms around Brian. "I know you love me and that's what counts right?"

"Yeah but even you thought that in the beginning. You thought I only said I loved you because of the bomb, which might have been true but I meant it." A single tear ran down Brian's cheek.

Justin's heart ached for Brian, he kissed the single tear and his own tears began to well up in his eyes. "I know you meant it."

Brian turned around and held Justin close to his body. "Can we go home?" Brian asked. He was ashamed for saying what he did. He wasn't the kind of person who expressed his feelings. 'I guess I really did change', he thought. 

Justin kissed Brian, "Yeah but you should go in there and say good bye to your son at least." Justin grabbed Brian's hand and led him into the house. Gus ran up to him with tears running down his face.

"Daddy you came back. Mama said I wasn't going to see you for the whole trip." He put his face in Brian's shoulder crying even harder.

"Sonny boy no matter how mad I get at your moms, I always love you," he looked up and Lindsey and Melanie, "an them too."

Lindsey came over and kissed Brian on the cheek. "I love you too Peter and I am truly happy for you."

"Yeah Brian it's all cool," said Hunter shaking his and then Ben gave his congratulations too.

Debbie walked over and hugged him and Justin. "I'm so ha-"she chocked, "happy for you both. Treat each other good." Everyone knew that was meant for Brian. 

"Okay mom," Brian gave the old tongue in the cheek smile and gave Debb another hug. 

Slowly Ted, Melanie, Emmett, Drew, Blake, and Carl came over to congratulate them. Mikey stayed in the kitchen. Brian hated not talking to Mikey, but if he wasn't going to support him then why should he even bother. Brian said his final good byes giving one last glance and Mikey. He sighed and grabbed Justin's hand walking out. Justin rubbed Brian back encouragingly. 

"Your okay now, Mikey will come around I promise you." They climbed into Brian's car. Justin was happy everyone knew but he knew Brian was sad about Michael. 


	3. promise me

They got home and Justin helped Brian take off his clothes. Normally Brian would protest but he was not in the mood to fight any longer. They got under the sheets and Justin held Brian in his arms.

"Brian Kinney- Taylor," whispered Justin.

Brian turned over to face Justin, "What?"

"I said Brian Kinney- Taylor," he smiled and kissed Brian.

"Ha! Brian Taylor- Kinney sounds better." He smiled.

"Always the stubborn one," after a few minutes Justin heard Brian's even breathing and knew he was asleep. He kissed Brian and smiled. "Night my lover."

Justin woke up and started to get up. Brian's arms tightened more around him. "Uh, uh where do you think your going Sunshine?"

"I want to make breakfast, I do get pretty hungry remember." Justin slipped out of Brian's arms. Brian went into the kitchen and started making his breakfast shake. He noticed while Justin was making breakfast his hand shook.

"Is your hand acting up again?"

Justin looked down at his hand, and frowned, "Yeah every once and a while." He shook his hand and smiled, "Its nothing. Just a reminder of why I keep going."

"Hm…" Brian started to wash the dishes while Justin cleaned up the bedroom. "Throw those in the laundry basket the maid will get them later, there are fresh sheets in the ..."

Justin cut him off laughing, "I've lived here for almost 6 years you don't think I know by now." 

Brian smiled more to himself, 'had it really been 6 years'. He still remembers the first night he saw the gorgeous blonde. Standing under that street lamp like an underwear model, like Mikey likes to put it. Mikey that was a sad place he didn't feel like going. Brian went down to get the mail out of their box. On his way up in the elevator he opened a letter from the John Hopkins Hospital with his latest test results. 

**Mr.Kinney,**

**We are sorry to inform you that your test results returned to us with alarming results. It seems the cancer has returned, but we are hopeful that we can tackle it like we did the last time. We advise that you call the hospital nearest you the fastest you can to set up an appointment. Most likely you will have to go through more radiation and chemo this time too. Please call me when you have everything set up Mr.Kinney this is very important, and not to be take lightly.**

**Dr. J Reynolds**

Brian leaned against the elevator door in shock. It couldn't be back could it? Life wasn't that unfair, he just got Justin back into his life, and he was going to get married for Christ sake. Tears of fear fell silently. Suddenly the door open and Justin looked up. Brian hid his face trying to clear the tears. 

"There you are silly. I was wondering what was taking you so long. What some letter from Elton John keeping you blotted in the elevator." Justin walked over and started to massage Brian.

Brian tried to make jokes, "Pssh! That Queen doesn't have the time to send mail to us lonely peasants." Brian's voice had cracked and he knew Justin heard it. He turned to face Justin. His eyes were red and puffy and tears were still managing to spill over no matter how much he tried to stop them. 

"Brian! What's wrong?" Justin was worried. He buried himself into Brian's body wiping the tears away with one hand while placing the other hand around Brian. "Please, tell me."

Brian was silent and handed the letter to Justin. "Here." It took Justin a minute to read. His face was calm but Brian knew a lot was going on in his mind. "Fuck Justin say something."

Justin took Brian's hand and pulled him onto the couch and he sat on Brian's lap facing towards him. "Here's the plan ready. You are not to push me or anyone else away like you did before. You will go to Kinnetic and assign Ted and Cynthia as partner's that way the company won't go totally down the drain when you take off for radiation and chemo. You will not over exert yourself in anyway. You will rest when you're tired and you will take care of yourself. I will go to all your appointments with you, as moral support. Got it?" 

Brian leaned up and kissed Justin, "What would I do without you?" 

"I don't know, but now you will call the hospital and make an appointment and then we are going to take a shower." Justin got off Brian's lap and handed him the phone. After that he went into the bedroom and sat down. He made sure that Brian was on the phone before he broke down. He buried his face in Brian's pillow and cried until he thought he would be okay. He looked up to the ceiling and closed his eyes, doing something he never does pray. "God, I know I don't talk to you often. Or ever I guess but I need you to do me a favor. Protect him, get him through this. I can't, make that I won't live without him."

"Justin!" Justin hadn't realized Brian was standing there the whole time. "You have to understand something," Brian took Justin's face in his hands. "No matter what ever happens to me, whether its cancer or getting hit by a car you will love without me. You will get out there and find someone that is 10 x better then me. You will love that person with the love you have showed me these years. I don't ever want to hear you say that again. Fuck God. Fuck Me for god sakes you must promise me to keep loving and keep living above all."

Justin's tears were still rolling down his face. Brian took him into his arms stroking his hair. Justin nodded and promised he would keep living the best he could, but that Brian wouldn't die so he didn't have to worry. Brian told him he set up an appointment later that day so they should take that shower. After the shower they laid in bed for a while contemplating each other. 

"Above all live," Justin smiled, "When did you get so romantic?"

"About the time I started spinning you around at your prom remember?" 

"Ever the romantic," Justin smiled and kissed Brian.

"Did you know you loved me back then? I mean like. Well when was the first time you knew? The first time you know knew, you loved me I mean?" 

Brian looked at him, and then sat up. "I think I knew I loved you once I held you in my arms after you bashing. Some how later on I convinced myself that I just had stronger feelings than you, like more friend feelings you know, but like most things Debb told me. I was sitting in the bar; this was after you asked me if you only lived with me because of the bashing. She came over and said that you deserved better but that she knew me and she knew I loved you." Brian kissed Justin and continued, "From that moment on I knew I did, I just never knew I how to say it so I expressed it the only way a Kinney could. By offering you stuff like a key to loft or a new computer you now."

"I'm sorry," Justin frowned.

"What the fuck for?" Brian frowned too. 

"For betraying you with Ethan, now that I know you loved me I realized how much I could have or actually probably did hurt you. I'm sorry I never meant to I just felt … I don't know."

"I'm sorry, maybe if I showed you that I loved you or actually told you then all would be better. We would probably be married by now with 4 kids and a cat."

"Dog," Justin smiled and kissed Brian. 


	4. let the truth out

Later on Justin got dressed while Brian confirmed the appointment. He peered over at Brian and saw the lines of worry and stress etched onto his forehead. He told himself over and over how he had to be strong for Brian.

"Ready?" Justin jumped; he hadn't realized that he was day dreaming.

"Uh, yeah," Justin smiled encouragingly. 

They headed off to the doctor each of them worried about a different thing. Brian was worried about Justin, worried that if anything happened to him Justin wouldn't be taken cared of. That's why before he left he called Ted and made sure a trust fund for Justin was started off with one million dollars. He told Ted to make sure most of his things were written off to Justin and Gus. Of course being Ted he asked 'why', but Brian told him he would tell Ted later. The doctor had set up radiation appointment and chemo appointments on separate days. He told them exactly what was going to happen and how they had to wish for the best. God, Brian hated that term 'wish for the best'. What the fuck do they think people sit there and wish for misery? Now it was Brian's turn to keep up the promise he told Justin. They both headed to Kinnetic and Brian called a meeting with Cynthia and Ted. Justin went to the art department, because ever since he was back he had been working on campaigns for Brian. 

"Hey Bri, you wanted to see me?" Ted peered into Brian's office nervously.

"Yes Theodore, come in." Ted took a seat next to Cynthia who was already looking bored of the situation.

"Why are we here Brian, I have a million calls to make and appointments to set up." Cynthia finally asked.

"Fine I will cut to the chase. You have both just made partner. You will get a 30 increase in your paychecks plus 10 of the business. Before you ask the reason is because my cancer is back. Stop there Theodore I don't want pity, I will be out a lot and I need to make sure the business is in hands of people I can trust to get the job done." Brian smiled at their shocked faces, "Okay leave go count numbers and make calls I don't pay you to stand around." They both left still in a state of shock. 

"Well by Ted's stuttering and Cynthia's sudden need to go shopping I'm guessing you told them?" Justin was leaning on the door frame laughing.

Brian chuckled, "Yep now what's next on your list of demands? Oh yes I have to go tell the family. Well Melanie and Lindsey leave tonight so I guess now is the best time."

Justin frowned, "Yeah before Ted tells them and your in really deep shit."

Brian smiled and grabbed his coat heading out with Justin. They knew from experience never to show up to family occasions without a peace offering. They stopped at a Big 'Q' store to buy a pie, and a final gift for J.R. and Gus. They showed up around 8:00pm and the whole family was there for the goodbye dinner for the girls. Justin handed the pie to Debbie and went to take a seat in the living room. Brian could see Ted eyeing him like he was going to collapse.

"Justin," Brian whispered in his ear. "I'm going to tell them one by one not all at once because I don't want Mikey knowing. He doesn't care about me but I know he will be forced to act nice cause of this and I don't want that."

Justin nodded and squeezed Brian's hand. After dinner Brian took a sleepy Gus up to the girl's room with Melanie and Lindsey behind caring Jenny Rebecca. Brian sat on the bed staring at Gus.

Lindsey came over and put a hand on Brian's cheek, "I know you miss him, but you realize it's for the best right."

"Yeah Brian I mean he is happy he has friends with 2 mommy's too and you know he fits in." Melanie added while changing Jenny's diapers.

Brian sighed. There were so many comments he could make but he didn't have the energy. "I have something to tell you two sit down." They looked at him hesitantly but took a seat by the desk. "I got my results back from the doctor this morning and it says my cancer has returned. Listen I don't want you guys to worry, but honestly I'm only telling you because Justin made me promise. You have to know I will beat this right? I won't leave my sonny boy without a father."

Melanie was the first to speak; she walked over and kissed the side of Brian's face. Something that was very unusual for her. "I know you will be this shit because you're Brian Kinney." 

Brian looked up a little shock but smiled, "Thanks Melanie." He looked over to Lindsey who had been trying to repress her tears but was failing miserably. He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her, "Don't worry Wendy I will return." Lindsey sobbed harder but after a while readjusted herself and they all went down stairs. Brian went next to Ted and whispered silently in his ear, "I need you to take Emmett to the porch and tell him but say it was from me that I am telling you and that he isn't the last to know. Thank you Theodore." 

Debbie had been talking to Justin, "Sunshine I think you should wear a dress. I mean those beautiful features in a nice white gown. Even though god knows you aren't even close to a virgin but it's our little secret. "

Justin looked at her with a mix of humor and humility. "Deb I…"

Mid way through his sentence Brian stopped him, "He's wearing a tux. I'm marrying a strong man not a flamboyant drag queen. Debb I need to tell you something."

"Sure what is it Hunny?" 

"Not here," Brian pulled her into the back yard. "Justin go get Ben for me." Justin nodded and returned shortly with Ben at his heels. "I need something to tell you both, because I trust you but none of you are to repeat this to Michael. I don't need him thinking he should act all nice all of the sudden because of this. This morning," he took a deep breath, "I got a letter from the doctor's saying my cancer had return. I'm returning to chemo and all that other shit and there is no reason for anyone to worry."

"What the fuck do you mean there is no reason to worry," Debbie frowned and took Brian's face in her hands. "Listen to me you little shit, I want a play by play on your health every fucking day. You know what fuck that I'm coming over to cook for you everyday. Soup and fresh fruit is what you need." Her eyes began to fill with tears and she pulled Brian into a hug.

"No you will not, but once a week how about that," Debbie nodded and he hugged her tighter. "Thanks mom, but please both of you don't tell Michael."

"Don't tell Michael what?" Michael was standing in the door way the whole time. He raised his voice, "Don't tell Michael his best friend has cancer." Michael had tears run down his face. "I'm the first person that should be told Brian, I have always been there. I should know before everyoneky definitely before Justin, Ben, and Ma."  
"No that's where you're wrong. You shouldn't know before Justin because Justin is my partner. Fuck Mikey when will you understand that. Yeah fine before Ben and Debb sure but you lost that yesterday when you said all that shit about my relationship, and me. You don't know me any longer. Like you said once, just because we've known each other our how lives doesn't mean we have to keep being friends."

Brian looked at him in disbelief, he grabbed Justin's hand. Leaving a quick kiss on Debb's cheek and walked into the house. He said his good byes to everyone and got into the car. He was about to burst Justin knew it, but this wasn't the time or place. Justin leaned over and kissed Brian passionately.

"What was that for?" Brian looked surprised but pleased.

"Just to shut up," Justin chuckled.

"I didn't even say anything," Brian protest.

"Yet," Justin smiled and the mood was back to calm, raw, sexual tension.


	5. it's okay dont worry

It had been a long day. Justin was sitting outside the radiation room waiting for Brian to finish his treatment. It was his first treatment and since Justin wasn't with him the last time he had radiation done he didn't know what to expect. Brian told him puking, exhaustion, and crankiness was to be expected, but that was regular for Brian. Puking from drinking so much, exhaustion from partying to late, and crankiness from just being him, that's Brian. Justin crossed his legs and began to draw this family who was sitting across from him. The mother was rocking her baby with a look of worry. She had someone in this hospital that was very sick. All of the sudden he felt someone sit in the chair next to him, he looked over and was staring at Mikey.

"What are you doing here?" Justin said looking back down at his sketch book.

"I need him to know, to know I'm here for him. I need him to know that I believe in him, that I believe he can get through this. Do you know when Ben was in the hospital he came and convinced me that I could get through it all?" Mikey willed himself not to cry. He had to tell Justin what he came to say. He had to make amends before he lost his best friend. "You have to know something. The night of your bashing I went over to the hospital and found Brian sitting in a seat like this. He had that scarf of his with… with your blood on it around his neck. His eyes were red and puffy with tears streaming down. That's when I knew he loved you. Brian doesn't cry for anyone, not even himself. It's jealousy that consumed me from then on. He felt everything for you that I wanted him to feel for me. Sure he loved me, but he was in love with you."

Justin suddenly felt a pang in his heart. He didn't know what to say. No one ever told him that Brian cried for him, but that it affected Mikey so much he hated that. Justin put his hand on Mikey's and smiled, "You have to know I will take c-care of him. Right?" Mikey just nodded, "Brian really cried that night."

"Yeah, he was scared to loose you, though he would never really admit it. He spent every night here from that day. He convinced us all, that he was going to the baths or bringing some trick home but he was actually here. Your mom told me once, in an argument we had about me leaving you two alone. "

Justin turned to look at him shocked. He always knew Brian loved him, but he sometimes thought he just convinced himself of that. Justin opened his mouth to say something when Brian poked his head out of the room in the hospital gown.

Brian's eyes were closed because he felt ashamed to ask Justin for more help. "Can you come here for a second?" When he opened his eyes he saw Mikey sitting next to Justin, with Justin's hand on Mikey's. "What the fuck is he doing here?" Brian pinched the bridge of his nose. "You know what I'm not in the mood, I'm tired and all I want is to put my cloths on and go home. Justin please," Brian motioned his hand into the room so that Justin could come help.

"Wait here," Justin whispered to Michael. "I'm coming," Justin rushed into the room. It was scary in there; there was a table with a gun like thing pointing down to it. Brian sat at a table, and closed his eyes. Justin walked over and helped Brian out of the gown. He gave Brian a quick kiss on the lips, "I love you." He went over to the table to grab the rest of Brian's cloths.

"Mhm," was all Brian could muster. Justin pulled Brian's shirt on over his head. Then he pushed Brian back onto the table and helped him with his pants and shoes. He pulled Brian back up and onto his feet. "I feel like a two year old."

Justin smiled and put an arm around Brian helping him walk out of the room and sitting him in the seat he was occupying before. Justin leaned in and kissed Brian, "Like a good two year old sit here and talk to Michael while I go get something to eat." Justin went into the cafeteria and bought himself a cup a soup. After 20 minutes he thought he should get back before he found Brian trying to drive home himself. When he got to the chairs he found Michael crying in Brian's arms. Justin smiled leaning on a vending machine.

Brian looked over and saw Justin smiling. He reached out his hand and Justin walked over and took it. "I'm tired, let's go home." He mouthed.

Justin nodded, "Okay Mikey, Brian has to come home and sleep now. We want him to get better right." Mikey nodded and followed them to their car. He helped Brian get into the passenger seat and waved goodbye hopping into his own car. Justin took Brian's hand, "How you doing there?"

Brian leaned his head back and squeezed Justin's hand, "Like shit." Once they got home Justin helped Brian take his clothes off and laid him on the bed. "This sucks," Brian started to shake. Justin took a blanket and wrapped it around Brian while wrapping his hands around him. Justin was about to say some comforting words when Brian jumped out of the bed and ran into the bathroom. He stood there rubbing Brian's back. Brian just leaned on the toilet, "You shouldn't have to go through this you know."

"Oh shut up, I am here so deal with it."

After washing his mouth out Justin helped Brian back into bed. He laid there with Brian in his arms for hours. Brian would shake from the cold and every so often he would run out of bed into the bathroom to throw up. Justin didn't know what to do for Brian other then to show him he was there. Justin called Kinnetic to make sure everything was alright. A few hours later Justin was by the computer drawing something so he could send it over to Kinnetic. Brian stirred and Justin looked up as Brian tried to get himself up. Justin ran to his side and helped him up.

"Fuck!" He paused and shook his head. "Well speaking of Fucking when the hell am I going to do that again."

Justin laughed, "Leave it to you to be sick as fuck and all your thinking about is … well fuck." He held Brian in his arms, "Well what am I talking about is in not Brian Kinney who said and I quote 'I don't believe in love, I believe in fucking. It's honest, it's efficient - you get in and out with a maximum of pleasure and a minimum of bullshit.'"

"You pay to much attention to what I say, especially when it was over 6 years ago that I said that." He turned in Justin's arms and looked up at him. "Here's a twist in the story usually I'm holding you in my arms." Justin kissed him, "I don't mind the change so much, and I can see why you like it."

Justin laughed, "Why thank you I'm glad that all my misery that brought me running into your arms is a delight to you in some way."

Brian rolled his eyes and got up slowly, "Sunshine you can be such a queen sometimes." He walked into the kitchen, "I'm starving but of course all that goes in must come out." Justin rubbed Brian's back, "Your way to comforting sunshine."

"Killing you with kindness," he smiled and started to make chicken broth. "There are worse ways to go yah know."


	6. maybe its back to normal

6 months later

Justin was sprawled out on the floor painting as he often did these days. He had a show in 3 months and 25 pieces to complete and send to New York. Most of his painting's consisted of brown and red these days and although everyone loved his paintings and paid a lot of money for them only he knew the true meaning behind them. Brian walked in and began to complain about 'some asshole' down at the grocery story.

"Hello? Justin are you even listening?" Brian waved a hand in front of Justin's face.

Justin shook his head and looked up at Brian, "What? Oh come on Brian I have asked you not to distract me when I am painting. I have to get these done by March and I only have 3 done."

Brian made a face of mock indignation, "Excuse me for wanting to come home and bitch and moan to my fi… to my Justin."

Justin chuckled and stood up, "Ready repeat after me." Justin raised his hand at every syllable, "Fi-an-ce." Justin shook his head, "imagine when you're going to have to present me as your husband."

Brian cocked his head and furrowed his brow, "Justin … Justin." Brian wrapped his arms around Justin and pulled him around to face him. "Justin what the fuck is the matter with you?"

Justin shook his head, "I'm sorry Brian I'm just preoccupied with this and the wedding plans and oh my god Brian, you're doctor's appointment."

Brian chuckled and pulled Justin over to the sofa. "Justin the doctor's appointment is tomorrow, okay?" Justin shook his head, "As for the wedding Emmett has that taken cared of and you are brilliant you will get the paintings done." He pulled Justin closer to him, "If you're going to be my hus-ban-d than I need you to be safe and taken cared of and not ill with exhaustion." Brian kissed the side of Justin's face, "and I bought the downstairs so we would have more room. I made you a studio why do you keep painting up here?"

Justin burrowed his way deeper into Brian's body, "It's where I spent most of my time in the last 7 years. It gives me inspiration and memories."

Brian looked around the loft. It had held a different kind of memory for him and now he wondered what it held for Justin, "What memories?"

Justin looked around and pointed to the bed, "Let's start with the most obvious. I lost my virginity in that bed that alone held a special place. Not to mention the countless times you held me in your arms and made sure I was safe." He looked around and pointed to the dining room table, "Right there is when I really knew you cared about me."

"The Dining room table, but we hardly eat there."

Justin chuckled, "Do you remember jambalaya?"

Brian raised his head and smiled, "Ah yes I remember now." Brian shook his head, "you are ridiculous at times sunshine."

"Yes but that is why you love me?"

"It is," he kissed sunshine, "I must admit it is."

_Knock Knock,_ Before letting anyone answer Emmett opened the door to the loft and began to call out there name.

"Brian? Justin sweetie?" Emmett peered around the loft and couldn't find anyone. Eventually he headed to the downstairs addition.

Justin got off of Brian and began the laugh, "Why didn't you let me tell him we were here? You know eventually he is going to find out we are here and then we are going to have to talk about 'the day'." Brian raised his eyebrows, "The retched wedding remember?"

Brian got up and walked over to the kitchen. "It's not a … how did you put it, retched day. I am perfectly content in committing myself to you for life; my only problem is that's all Emmett seems to want to talk about. Between the barging me with questions about floral arrangements during breakfast and the calling at 3am to confirm that we want blue and white not blue and silver it is getting a tad annoying don't you think so?"

Justin went behind Brian and wrapped his arms around the brunettes waist, "You know it's not everyday Brian Kinney commits his body and soul to one little twat. People want to make it special," he slapped Brian's ass. "So deal with it and put a happy face on," Justin walked over to the staircase that led downstairs. "Emmett we're up here," he called out and returned to his painting on the floor.

Emmett spoke to them about the final arrangements. The wedding was to be this weekend and they had a lot to accomplish before then. Emmett made sure the wedding went by smoothly but they had to make sure they got their suits and rings. After the final arrangements for Saturday's festivities were over Brian ushered Emmett over with the promise of going to the tux shop tomorrow after the doctor's appointment. Brian went to take a shower while Justin prepared for dinner.

Justin came into the shower behind Brian and wrapped his arms around him, "Weren't you making dinner or something?"

"It's done. Unlike you I can make a delicious three course meal – with no carbs of course seeing how it's after 7, in 30 minutes." Brian turned Justin around and kissed him, "You're welcome."

Brian continued to kiss a line of butterfly kisses along the side of Justin's face. "We have to get out soon."

Justin's eyes opened wide in curiosity, "Oh yeah? Why's that?"

"Because it' almost 10pm and you volunteered us to pick up the Muncher's and the kids from the air port remember?"

Justin hit his head against Brian's chest, "You're right. Fuck Brian can't you call Michael and ask him to do it?"

"Justin he's already letting them stay at his place come on now." Justin got up in frustration and began to change into more airport appropriate clothing, "Think about it this way if we put them up then we'd have absolutely no alone time."

Justin smiled and tilted his head to the said as if to acknowledge Brian was right. "Do we have time to eat? I didn't cook for the house to smell delicious."

Brian looked at his watch, "Yes but no feeding each other that always adds about an hour to our dinner."

**I know I know It has taken me ages to upload.  
Life has been stressful but as summer approaches my updates will be more frequent.  
If you ever notice me not updating in a while check my about me it usually explains why.**

**R&R thanks ;)**


	7. Oh Shit Vows!

**Disclaimer: I do not own any Queer As Folk characters -- I only own the story line.  
If I did own QAF we would still be watching it on showtime and they would be fuckin married **

**A/N: By the way all of you who reviewed thank you. I'm glad you liked the story!!**

Justin paced his studio for the 1, 000's time that day. _I'm a fucking artist I draw I do not write, especially vows. I'm an artist not a writer like … like … Ben!_ Justin rushed out of the studio and into the second hall way and grabbed the cordless phone dialing Michael and Ben's house phone as quickly as possible.

"Novotny- Bruckner Residents," Michael always answered the phone like that. Brian would yell at him on regular bases about how ridiculous he sounded because no one, not even hetero-fuckers, answered the phone like that except in movies.

Justin sighed, "Hey Mikey its Justin can I talk to Ben?"

"Justin? Why are you calling? Shouldn't you be getting ready for your wedding? Listen you little shit if your backing out on Brian again I swear to the unnamed gay goddess I will beat the shit out of you I don't care what state, country, or fuckin continent your in."

Justin rolled his eyes, "I'm not backing out now fuckin put Ben on. You really think I would actually call this house if I was backing out."

"You better not," Mikey called out Ben's name.

"Hello Justin?" Ben always spoke with such calm.

"Thank god listen Ben I need your help."

"Yeah what's up?"

"Vows…"

After that Ben and Justin spent an hour on the phone writing Justin's vows. Justin was happy with it and left to go get his tux from the shop. When he went upstairs he found his tux on a hook by the door with a little note.

**I figured you would be too busy trying to finish  
your vows that if you actually did go pick the tux up you would be late. **

**Don't be nervous remember your just swearing in front of a shit  
loud of people that you're mine forever.  
I hope you can handle that.  
P.S. I heard sex on the wedding night is better  
we will test that out tonight.**

_Ever the Romantic, _Justin smiled down at the note and folded it up putting it in his suit pocket along with his vows. By the time he got dress and combed his hair there was a congregation of people in the loft that was going to ride with him to the haul. Justin was suppose to ride with his Mother and Tucker, Molly, Daphne and her new boo, Emmett and Drew, and Cameron. Brian was to ride with Michael and Ben, Lindsey and Gus, (Melanie was going to ride with J.R. in their car.), Ted and Blake, and Debbie and Carl. Justin had secretly sent invitations to Brian's family but of course they didn't show up.

Justin came out of the bedroom fully clothed

, "Oh Justin you look so Handsome." Jennifer began to take pictures of Justin and was fixing everything she could on the suit which was perfect to begin with but you know mothers.

"Yeah you look nice … for once." Molly giggled and hugged Justin.

Justin rolled his eyes, "Thanks Molusk."

"Oh Justin please don't call me that!" She groaned and walked away.

"Okay people it's time to go, everyone out." Emmett called ushering people out of the loft. He turned to Drew and whispered into his ear, "I think I have the most handsome date here – Don't you think?"

Drew laughed and kissed Emmett, "Yeah I agree."

The plan was that both men were suppose to come down the aisle with some one on each side (normally it would be their parents but in this case it would be a little different.) After everyone took their seats the music began. Little J.R. came trotting down the aisle throwing flowers everywhere, and I mean everywhere in peoples faces on the ground in the air, it was cute of course. Then Gus came down in a cute little tux bearing the rings. A different kind of music began to play and Brian started to head down the aisle. He was accompanied by Michael on one side and Lindsey on the other. When he reached the front Justin began to come down the aisle. He had his mother on one side and Debbie on the other. When their eyes locked they smiled and both thought '_Damn he is beautiful.'_ They probably would have laughed if they knew they said the same thing. They started with their vows.

Brian took Justin's hands, "Well here it goes (Everyone laughed), Today, Justin, I join my life to yours, not merely as your husband, but as your friend, your lover, and your confidant. Let me be the shoulder you lean on, the rock on which you rest, the companion of your life. With you I will walk my path from this day forward." Brian kissed Justin and a couple seconds later pulled away.

Debbie was in tears, "Hey that's for the end!" Everyone laughed and now it was Justin's turn.

"Well fuck how do you follow that," He gave a sunshine smile. "I was trying to figure out a way to show you how much I love you well here goes,

I LOVE YOU THIS MUCH... ENOUGH TO DO ANYTHING FOR YOU GIVE MY LIFE, MY LOVE, MY HEART AND MY SOUL TO YOU AND FOR YOU' ENOUGH TO WILLINGLY GIVE ALL OF MY TIME, EFFORTS. THOUGHTS, TALENTS, AND TRUST TO YOU ENOUGHT TO WANT TO PROTECT YOU' CARE FOR YOU, GUIDE YOU, HOLD YOU COMFORT YOU, LISTEN TO YOU, AND CRY TO YOU AND WITH YOU, ENOUGH TO BE SILLY AROUND YOU NEVER HAVE TO HIDE ANYTHING FROM YOU, AND BE MYSELF WITH YOU... I LOVE YOU ENOUGH TO SHARE ALL OF MY SENTIMENTS, DREAMS, GOALS, FEARS, HOPES, AND WORRIES MY ENTIRE LIFE WITH YOU ENOUGH TO WANT THE BEST FOR YOU, TO WISH FOR YOUR SUCCESS AND TO HOPE FOR THE FULFILMENT OF ALL OF YOUR ENDEAVOURS ENOUGH TO KEEP MY PROMISES TO YOU AND PLEDGE MY LOYALY AND FAITHFULLNESS TO YOU. ENOUGH TO CHERISH YOUR FRIENDSHIP ADORE YOUR PERSONALITY, RESPECT YOUR VALUES AND SEE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE... I LOVE YOU ENOUGH TO FIGHT FOR YOU COMPROMISE FOR YOU AND SACRIFICE MYSELF FOR YOU IF NEED BE ENOUGH TO MISS YOU INCREDIBLE WHEN WE ARE APART, NO MATTER WHAT LENGHT OF TIME ITS FOR AND REGARDLESS OF THE DISTANCE ENOUGH TO BELIEVE IN OUR RELATIONSHIP TO STAND BY IT THROUGH THE WORST OF TIMES, TO HAVE FAITH IN OUR STRENGTH AS A COUPLE, AND TO NEVER EVER GIVE UP ON US ENOUGH TO SPEND THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH YOU, BE THERE FOR YOU, WHEN YOU NEED OR WANT ME, AND NEVER EVER WANT TO LEAVE YOU OR LIVE WITHOUT YOU... I LOVE YOU THIS MUCH…"

Justin looked around hesitantly; he looked at Ben who nodded in agreement. What Justin hadn't realized was there wasn't a dry eye in the whole room. He looked at Brian and saw the tears in his eyes. It shouldn't have made him smiled but the fact was that he touched Brian and all these people. Debbie was blubbering like idiot and Carl was trying to calm her down and Emmett had buried his face into Drew's shoulder to try to muffle his sobs.

Brian leaned in and whispered in Justin's ear, "Now more than ever I am certain I am 100 percent in love with you Sunshine. Oh yeah and if you ever tell anyone what a sap I'm being right now I will shoot you." He gave a breathtaking crooked smile and leaned back.

The administrator asked Gus for the rings and handed one to Justin and one to Brian. "Brian repeat after me, with this ring I thee wed, and all my worldly goods I thee endow. In sickness and in health, in poverty or in wealth, 'til death do us part."

Brian began to slip the ring on Justin's finger, "with this ring I thee wed, and all my worldly goods I thee endow. In sickness and in health, in poverty or in wealth, 'til death do us part." He slipped the ring on Justin's finger fully.

"Justin repeat after me, with this ring I thee wed, and all my worldly goods I thee endow. In sickness and in health, in poverty or in wealth, 'til death do us part." Justin did as he was told and slipped the ring on Brian's finger. "I know pronounce you committed partners in front of the state of Pennsylvania. Kiss already." The lady, Miss. Jean, who was the administrator smiled at the two.

Brian and Justin kissed and the hall erupted with applause. 2 minutes later they were still kissing and Debbie coughed which finally made them part.

Brian laughed and held Justin's hand, "Well we have a party next door whose coming?" Everyone laughed, "You know what I mean."

They all exited to the next hall still with the words of Justin's vows in his heads. All the couples reminded each other how much they loved one another and then they reminded each other how much they loved to dance and the night was spent with laughter and stories being told.

**Yeah their married!.  
Okay so I have another story that I might I add to this one that happens a couple years after 513 but it fits.  
Oh yeah I totally didnt make those vows up I couldnt think of anything so I went so all vows belong to them I suppose.**

**Well R&R I will be adding my other story in a bit D**


	8. Olivia

**A/N:**

**It's 8 years later. Justin and Brian had gotten a surrgate mother and used Justin's sperm to produce Olivia Elizabeth Kinney Taylor. They moved back into Britin and they were pretty much set for life. Everything else you need to know is explained. **

Brian was lying in bed peacefully dreaming, he had his arms encircled around Justin like he did every night. Subconsciously he protected Justin even in their sleep. It was 11am when Olivia came running into the room and pounced on the bed.

"Olivia!" they groaned in unison.

Olivia flinched but then put on her best sunshine smile, knowing they couldn't resist it, "Daddy's are supposed to be up before me making breakfast like every Saturday. Why you not up?"

Brian grabbed Olivia and pulled her in between them, "Sweet cheeks two things. Not so loud is number one and two where were your daddy's last night?"

Olivia put on her best thinking face which made Brian and Justin laughed. Then her eyes lit up and she beamed at them, "You were at Uncle Mikey's and Uncle Zen Ben."

Justin geared the conversation his way. Brian loved Olivia with all his heart, but he is not the best morning person, especially when he has a hangover. "Angel we got back from your Uncle's house pretty late so we didn't get much sleep. Here how about this, why don't you go get dressed and we will meet you down stairs."

"Okay daddy!" She leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek, and then she looked over at Brian. He had his head back on the window and he was pinching the bridge of his nose, like when he's aggravated. She leaned over to him and gave him a big up, "I love you dad."

Brian melted in her arms, "Go get dressed sweet cheeks." After Olivia ran out Brian pulled Justin into his arms, "Morning Sunshine."

Justin intertwined their fingers, "Morning. Brian tell me something."

Brian was kissing the nook of his back, "Mhm anything."

"Why do you only tell her I love you when she's asleep?"

Brian frowned, "That's not true," even though he knew it was. Justin turned to face him giving him the 'don't bullshit me' face. "Fine it is but Justin what do you expect from me."

"You have to stop believing that people you love can read your mind."

Brian kissed Justin, "I love you."

Justin took Brian's face in his hands, "I love you too," and he kissed him. "However I've always known that even before you did. She is the one you need to tell."

At that moment Olivia came bounding into the room, "You guys weren't down stairs!"

"Okay we're going now let's go." Olivia jumped off the bed when Brian realized what she was wearing, "Wait!"

She turned quickly putting on her best puppy dog eyes, "Yes Daddy?"

Brian rolled his eyes; he crawled out of bed and took Olivia's hand, "Justin go make breakfast I'm going to make sure our daughter doesn't get Lesbian taste."

Justin looked down at Olivia's outfit. She had a purple t-shirt on with and orange long sleeve under it, and then she had a jean skirt with rainbow tights. "She looks cute," Justin said through fitful laughs.

"Don't encourage it," Brian growled. "Come on."

By the time Brian washed his face and brushed his teeth, and gotten dressed in jeans and a t-shirt Olivia was already waiting in her room with 3 new outfits. Brian sorted through them and found her a pair of black jeans with her favorite Flintstone's green t-shirt. He picked her up and they bounded down the stairs to the kitchen where Justin had pancakes ready.

"Daddy can I paint with you today?"

Justin looked over at Olivia, "Sweetie I'm not going to paint today." Olivia frowned, "I'm going over to Debbie's to help her with the Christmas Decorations."

Olivia's eyes lit up, "Really!"

Justin nodded, "Yeah you want to help me?"

"Well … I guess I could help." She laughed as Justin started to tickle her.

The bell rang and Brian and Olivia raced to answer it. At the door stood a 14 year old Gus beaming at his dad, with a suitcase in his hand.

"Gus what are you doing here?"

"Thanks Dad nice greeting."

Olivia pounced on Gus, "Gus Gus Gus!"

"Hi Sweet Cheeks," he hugged her and put her down.

Brian put a hand on Gus' back and guided him to the kitchen "Look Sunshine a stray puppy on the door step."

Justin looked up to see Gus, "Were you suppose to visit?"

"Of course not, he's not due for another 2 weeks. Gus what are you doing here?"

Gus looked down, and Brian pulled his face up giving him a 'tell me' look. "Well okay I don't know I got into a fight with mama I cant live there no more dad. It's all about J.R. It's like I do everything wrong and J.R. can do no wrong. She's 11 for Christ sake."

Brian frowned, "I'm going to call your mother and tell her you're here. How did you get here?"

"I took a cab. It cost me 82 from Pitts to here."

Brian went into his back pocket and took out a hundred dollar bill handing it to Gus. "Here don't waste it." He went over to the house phone and dialed Lindsey's number.

Lindsey: Hello?

Brian: Hey Wendy

Lindsey: Uh oh. What do you want?

Brian: You really don't know?

Lindsey: Brian what's wrong? You're scaring me.

Brian: Gus showed up at my door step 10 minutes ago.

Lindsey: Yes. He told me you invited him for the weekend. I had to go to the gallery but he said that you were going to pick him up.

Brian: Well he lied. He's telling me that he can't live with you guys anymore. He says that J.R. can do no bad while he does everything wrong

Lindsey: (sighed) Okay Brian just … I don't know keep him there obviously and I'll call Mel okay?

Brian: Mhm. Later.

Lindsey: Bye

Brian turned and looked Gus in the eyes. Gus flinched but was as stubborn as his father and kept eye contact. "So tell me now am I sleep talking again? Because I don't remember telling you spend the weekend with us." Brian sighed as Justin put a hand on his shoulder, "Gus if you asked you know you're always welcomed here. It's your house after all."

Gus looked up, "Well I knew you couldn't deny me if I just showed up but … I don't know with Olivia you have your hands full I guess."

Olivia frowned in concentration, she walked over and took Brian's hands in hers, "Yeah Gus but you fill his hands too see."

Gus, Brian and Justin laughed, "Sweetie that's not what he meant. Now you," Justin picked up Olivia, "come with me and let's get those sticky hands cleaned up so you can help me with Grandma Debb." She nodded and they both left.

Brian put an arm around Gus and they walked into the living room. "Gus listen to me no matter what happens you must know I love you and … you were the reason I can actually say those words." Brian laughed and shook his head, "Listen Sonny boy, how about you spend a week here. You can go to work with me in the morning and I can drop you off at school."

Gus opened his eyes, "You mean it?" He frowned.

"Yeah I mean it what's wrong?"

He shook his head, "Mamma and Ma would never allow it."

"Let me deal with them."

Gus shrugged, "I'm going with Justin to help Grandma Deb with the decorations. He was supposed to pick me up on the way there any way."

"Okay just drop your stuff in your room and get changed into something less glamorous." Brian motioned to an outfit he had bought his son from Barneys. Gus walked over and hugged his father.

"Thanks," he then headed up to his room.

Justin, Gus and Olivia had left around 1 to Debbie's house and promised to be back by 6 no matter what Debbie said. Brian spent most of the day working up a campaign for some shampoo which was pretty easy in itself. I mean seriously what is sexier then Mr. Right running into your shower because your hair smells good. At 4 the phone rang and when he looked at the caller ID he realized it was from Debbie's house. It could be Justin saying he wanted me to go over there or he was going to be later, both prospects weren't good. He decided in the end to answer the phone.

"Kinney," he answered smugly.

A sigh could be heard on the other line, "You know you're a real asshole."

Brian laughed at the sound of Debbie, "What did I do now?"

"You damn well know what you did. Tell me Brian what you say to convince him?"

Brian was truly perplexed now, "Debbie did you smoke to many joints what the fuck are you talking about?"

"What the hell did you say to sunshine to get him not to come help me with the Christmas decorations?"

Brian was getting worried, "Debbie, Justin Gus and Olivia left to your house hours ago."

A sharp inhale could be heard, "Sweetie they never got here. Tell me you're not shitting me?"

"Fuck Debb I'm going to try his cell phone …"

"Brian I already tried a hundred times," Her voice was choking up now.

"Okay I'll try maybe they ditched and don't want to pick up. Umm I will call you when I get news okay."

Debbie felt like running over and hugging Brian. The pain and fear could be heard in his voice, "Okay sweetie don't forget to call."

Brian hung up and tried calling Justin and Gus' phone but no answer. That's when he started to panic. He did what any frantic parent or lover would do he started to cry and then remembered to check the hospitals.

"West Virginia Tech Hospital, How may I help you today?" The sound of a singing voice filled Brian's hears calming his nerves slightly.

He paused and then remembered why he was calling, "Uh yeah see my … partner and our two kids went out about 4 hours ago and they haven't returned and no one has seen them and Debbie says they haven't gotten there and they left fours ago but of course you don't know who Debbie is. She is this lady who was practically my mother but yeah she is really loud and …"

"Sir," the receptionist interrupted, "can I have their description?"

"Description?"

"Yes like what they look like; red hair or black hair?"

It took Brian a little while to understand, "Oh yeah well my youngest Olivia she has blonde curls with big blue eyes. She is wearing a black jeans and a Flintstone shirt and let me see. There's a teenager and he had dirty blonde hair and hazel eyes and he has Kingdom shirt and jeans and a green hoodie. Justin has on …" He couldn't remember what Justin was wearing. How could he not remember what the love of his life is wearing? He makes it his duty to check him out every day. "Well he has blonde hair and blue eyes and …"

"Sir they are here. They got into an accident and were found about 3 hours ago. We have been trying to identify them all day but it seems some ruthless people stole their wallets and any other belongings they have. Could you please come as quick as possible?"

"Of course, I will be there right now."

"Sir your name?"

"Brian Kinney" and he hung up.

Brian drove the whole time with tears strolling down his eyes. _Pull it together Kinney you can't break down now. They need you, they are you're family and your life. You can't break down now. They're alright. You are going to get there and they are going to be laughing on the hospital bed about how Justin turned to avoid hitting a squirrel and they just hit a bush. _Unfortunately when Brian got to the hospital that wasn't the view he got. He ran through the hospital and found Justin lying in a bed unconscious.

"Sunshine," he whispered running across to his bed. He sat on the edge holding Justin's hand. He had some minor scratches but the worst of it was the way he hit his head on the wheel. It triggered some old injuries that put him back into this coma. The doctor had told Brian that Justin should awaken any minute. Brian pushed Justin's hair off his forehead. He hadn't gotten a haircut in over a year and his hair was a little past his shoulder but Brian found it sexy. He kissed Justin's forehead. "Get better Sunshine, I can't loose you. You know you're ten times stronger then me." A tear fell from Brian's eyes, "Please."

"Mr.Kinney," the singing voice from the phone earlier rang through the room.

Brian turned to see a beautiful girl with red locks and green eyes. She was wearing a nurse's uniform but still seemed to look good. "Yes?"

She gave that pity look to Brian which made him squirm. "Sir I know you want to stay here but you're … children?" She seemed uncertain of what to call them.

"Yes … yes of course."

Brian followed the nurse up to the children ward where Gus and Olivia were in the same room. Gus who was sitting up trying to eat some dinner the hospital had brought him kept steeling glances at Olivia. Olivia was lying in the bed next to him with a scar going across the side of her face; this made Brian sway a little.

"Dad," Gus called out when he saw Brian at the door way.

Brian crossed the room in 3 quick strides and had Gus in his arms, "Sonny Boy what happened?"

When Brian pulled away Gus took another quick glance at Olivia. "Well last thing I remember was Justin putting on some show tunes that he and Olivia always sing. We all started singing them eventually. Olivia's necklace fell off and at the red light Justin said she could take her seatbelt off and grab it quickly because Olivia was crying saying that if she lost it you be mad at her. So at the red light she took off the seat belt and went to go grab it and when I looked out my window a car was coming right at us and wasn't stopping but by the time I tried to tell Justin …" He started to choke up now, Brian put an arm around him and held him closer, "it was too late. I just woke up 10 minutes ago."

Brian kissed the boys cheek, "Sonny boy this isn't your fault. Okay?"

Gus nodded, "Where's my moms?"

Brian cursed loudly, "I forgot to call them and Debbie." Brian took his cell phone out.

Lindsey: Hello?

Brian: Lindsey there has been an accident.

Lindsey: What happened Brian!?

Brian: Justin, Gus, and Olivia were headed to Debs when some car hit them at a red light.

Lindsey: (sharp intake) is everyone okay?

Brian: Well, Gus is fine he is right next to me. Olivia and Justin are still in a coma.

Lindsey: Oh Brian I'm sorry. I will be right there … What hospital?

Brian: West Virginia Tech.

Brian hung up and called Debbie.

Debbie: Brian?

Brian: Yeah Debb it's me.

Debbie: Thank the lord. Did you find them?

Brian: Yes.

Debbie: Well where are they?

Brian: WVT

Debbie: Oh my god. Are they okay what happened?

Brian: They got into an accident Gus is awake and fine and Justin and Olivia are in a coma still.

Debbie: I will be right there Brian.

Before he could protest she had hung up. Brian turned to Gus again who was trying to find out what exactly was in the soup. Brian then walked over to Olivia and started to stroke her hair.

"Hey Princess, Aren't we suppose to go set up that pool basket ball thing you have been bothering me about for weeks?" He kissed her forehead, "I promise we will set it up as soon as you wake up." A tear streamed down his face, "Wake up please." He knew it was ridiculous to be talking about a pool in December but he had been to busy during the summer to do it.

Brian turned to see Gus inaudibly racked with tears. "I should have warned him. I saw the car I should have tried harder. . ."

Brian took Gus into his arms stroking his hair, "It wasn't your fault. It was that idiots in the car. Don't blame yourself Gus." All Gus could do was nod.

"Mr. Kinney, uh Mr. Taylor has now woken up if you wish to see him."

Brian nodded towards the nurse, "I will be back in a little while okay?" Gus nodded again and wiped the tears from his eyes.

Brian walked down to the first floor to find Justin trying unsuccessfully to lug all the wires out of his arm. When he looked up he saw Brian and began to shake with tears. Brian rushed over and hugged him.

"It's entirely my fault I shouldn't have …"

Brian kissed him, "Shut up. I would have done the same. Like I told Gus it was all the idiot in the other car. Please don't blame yourself Sunshine."

Justin nodded, "Brian …" he kissed Brian and dug himself deeper into his chest.

"So what were you trying to teach me this time sunshine?"

Justin looked up at Brian with questioning eyes, "Teach you?"

"Well let's see," Brian began to count on his finger while still holding Justin securely with his other hand. "First with your bashing you taught me how to show that I cared for you and get me to ask you to live with me. Then let's see we have your little escapade with the fiddler that, well actually I don't really know what you wanted me to tell you then, maybe that I will take you back no matter how bad you fuck up. Finally the bombing where you got this brute to say I love you and will you marry me."

Justin smiled and grabbed Brian by the nuts, "This time I wanted to 'teach you' that you need to fuck me more." He smiled and kissed Brian, "no but seriously I didn't have anything to show you this time, you're perfect."

"What yah thinking?" Brian asked after Justin staring off into space.

Justin shrugged, "I hope Olivia wakes up soon. The Doctor told me that Gus was awake but she was still in a coma," he chocked, "Brian what if …"

"Sh! don't even think it. She is as strong as or even stronger than you sunshine. Please don't shed another tear; she will be up soon running about." Brian hugged Justin close to his body.

Lindsey, Mel, and J.R. all walked in on the both of them. Mel coughed and Brian and Justin looked over to see them staring there awkwardly. J.R. ran over to Justin and Brian jumping and hugged Brian. "Uncle Brian! Where are Libby and Gus?" (When J.R. was younger she couldn't say Olivia and some how came out with Libby.)

"They're upstairs Gucci. (J.R. always use to head towards Brian's Gucci clothing so it was her nick name)" He turned towards Justin, "I'm going to show them upstairs I will be back in a bit." Justin nodded and Brian picked up J.R. heading towards Mel and Linds.

"Were glad you're okay Sweetie," Lindsey said.

"Yeah we'll come back down once we check on Gus," She gave a reassuring smile.

"Mommy come quick, come quick."

Mel turned to J.R. and saw her terrified look. Brian had taken the collar of a man in a wheel chair and thrusted him against a wall. "You stupid fuckin piece of shit," Brian screamed at the man.

"Brian," yelled Melanie and Lindsey running to pull him off the guy.

"This little piece of shit is the one who ran into them. Do you know my daughter is now in a fuckin coma cause of you!? My husband is lying in that room thinking it's his entire fault and my son upstairs thinks it's his fault also."

The man was on the floor quivering. Tears began to fall, "I'm sorry I didn't …"

"Sorry is bullshit, you better hope to god that you have a good lawyer, because my son's mother is a hell of a lawyer."

Melanie took his arm, "Come on Brian. This won't help me in court."

J.R. looked up at Brian taking his other arm, "Uncle Brian?"

Brian looked down at her pleading eyes, he picked her up, "Come on Gucci lets go see Gus."

The man stayed on the floor crying not allowing anyone to help him back into the wheelchair. They all went upstairs where the girls fussed over Gus. Brian sat holding Olivia's hand subconsciously. Without knowing he fell asleep at the chair and no one felt like waking him up. A couple hours later he felt an arm rest on his shoulder and he looked up. "Why aren't you in bed?"

"You said you were going to come back in a bit. When it came to 5 hours later I got a little worried." Justin smiled down Brian and sat on the edge of the bed stroking Olivia's hair. "You both mean the world to me you know?" He stroked the side of Brian's face, "I was a lost little boy just looking to get fucked, at least that's what I thought I wanted. Then you came along …"

"As I recall you were the one modeling under the light post changing my world." Brian smirked and grabbed Justin's free hand giving it a gentle kiss.

Justin closed his eyes as Brian's warm lips pressed against his right hand, "Brian you saved me from a world I never knew was wrong. This … gay society might have caused me a few bad days but …" Brian had now began to put his arms around Justin's waist and lifted his shirt slightly kissing the nape of his stomach. "It has given me so many better days. With the both of y…" Brian had pulled Justin on to his lap and kissed the side of his face. Justin pulled Brian's face to face him, "Horny much?"

"You said this was to teach me that I need to fuck you more," Brian smiled and just held Justin his lap. They watched Olivia for hours until they fell asleep.

Brian woke with a sudden start, he looked around but Olivia and Gus were both asleep. Justin lifted his head from Brian's shoulder. "What's wrong?"

Brian pushed Justin's head down, "nothing go back to sleep." The truth was that Brian heard Olivia and Gus laughing. He closed his eyes but heard it again, this time Justin looked up.

"Did you hear? …" Justin shook his head, "Never mind."

Brian looked confused, "No you heard laughing didn't you?"

This time Olivia and Gus laughed louder, "Daddy's were sleeping and we were trying not to wake you up, but daddy was talking in his sleep."

Justin blushed slightly and then it hit him that Olivia was awake. He jumped off Brian's lap and took Olivia in his arms, "Oh sweetie you're awake!"

Brian put his hand on Olivia's face, "How are you feeling Sweet cheeks?"

"I'm fine Dad, but I really wanna go home now. Auntie Melanie said we had to wait for you two to wake up and for the doctor to say okay. You're awake now can we go!"

Brian chuckled, "I'll go find the doctor okay?"

"Okay Daddy I love you!" She hugged him before he got up.

Brian stopped at the door, "I love you too Angel."

Justin looked up at Brian and beamed at him. After that Brian found a doctor and found out they needed to stay one more night. The next day when they got home to Britin they found a party for all of them.

Brian sat at his arm chair while everyone fussed over Gus, Justin, and Olivia. He smiled happy to have them here. Olivia and J.R. came running over.

"Daddy Hunter said me and Jenny aren't really related is that true?"

"Yeah aren't me and Libby Cousins?"

Brian glared at Hunter who shrugged, "technically you aren't but …" He searched for the right words. "Okay Gucci you're dad is Michael right?"

Jenny Rebecca nodded, "Right."

"Well Michael and I grew up together and we are practically brothers. I mean you're Grandma Debbie is basically my mother. So maybe by blood you aren't related but by love you are. Which take it from me is way better."

The two girls were satisfied with that answer and skipped away.

Justin came over and sat on the arm of the chair, "Connected by love, hmm you are becoming rather sappy aren't you?"

Brian rolled his eyes, "It satisfied them didn't them."

"Yeah if only their life would always be this simple."

"Hey I'm going to try damn hard to make it."

"Yeah we'll Jenny Rebecca has two moms and two dads. Olivia has to Dads and doesn't even know who her mother is. Then let's not mention the plethora of gay family members. Life isn't going to be simple no matter what year it is."

"Yeah but it is ten time easier from when I was at school."

"True, I just wish we could help them you know?"

Brian pulled Justin onto his lap, "Oh yeah like make a school 'the school for gay kids and kids with gay parents'." Justin's eyes twinkled, like it usually did when he got an idea. "Sunshine I was just joking." Justin got up and pulled a notepad out of the draw. "Sunshine it was a joke …"

Too late Justin was already writing away. By now he had gotten the phone book out. Brian sighed and poured himself a drink. That's Justin … God help me!

**That's it this story is complete. I might write a sequal I don't know yet. I hope you enjoyed it.**

**R&R **


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